


Handing Out L's

by mycarlydotcom



Series: The Funny Business Timeline [2]
Category: iCarly
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:26:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23150140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mycarlydotcom/pseuds/mycarlydotcom
Summary: Sam talks Freddie into attending a haunted attraction during the Halloween season, but the tables turn when she ends up becoming the one who is most frightened.
Relationships: Freddie Benson/Sam Puckett
Series: The Funny Business Timeline [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1661167
Comments: 1
Kudos: 21





	Handing Out L's

**Author's Note:**

> Setting: The next story in The Funny Business Timeline, set about two months after the events of Funny Business.
> 
> General Notes: So, this is second piece in this project. It was originally written in the fall, hence the Halloween theme present in this installment. Stayed tuned for the next installments, and thanks to anyone who reads!

**_Handing Out L's:_ **

**_Chapter I: "I'll Take My Apple Cider Now"_ **

' _Ghouls, Ghosts, and Goblins! The most haunted attraction in Seattle!'_ Sam read on a sign several yards away.

" _Will you stop getting distracted and take this picture, Puckett!"_ Mrs. Benson exclaimed, trying to capture of photo of her son and his girlfriend.

Freddie was on his families' yearly October visit to the pumpkin patch, and this year he brought Sam along with hopes it would facilitate some camaraderie between his girlfriend and family. Unfortunately, things weren't exactly going smoothly. Sam had a pretty difficult time clicking with most of his nubby relatives, and as you'd expect, she was consistently at odds with his mother.

" _Oh, can it!"_ Sam shot back at her. " _I looked away for one second."_

Grimacing in frustration, Freddie's mothered glanced at him disapprovingly.

" _Sam, c'mon,"_ he whispered, " _Don't feed into it."_

" _Feed into what?"_ she replied, " _She's being rude. She's always rude."_

" _Yeah, I know she is,"_ Freddie continued, " _But you're instigating her again like you always do."_

" _Like I always do?"_ she said agitatedly. " _Gee, thanks for having my back Benson."_

" _C'mon, Sam don't be like that,"_ he titled his head, _"I always have your back. You know what I meant."_

" _No, I don't Freddie,"_ she replied defiantly. " _She's been giving me chiz all day long, and I've bit my tongue the entire time."_

Freddie remained quiet as she let out the frustration that was boiling over.

" _I try to defend myself one time, and somehow I'm the bad guy,"_ she added before crossing her arms and looking away.

" _You're right, I'm sorry,"_ he apologized. " _You've been great today. I know my mom is giving you hard time…"_

" _Yeah, like she always does,"_ Sam commented.

" _Can't you just hang in there for a bit longer?"_ he pleaded.

" _I'm here aren't I?"_ she said bluntly.

" _Yes, and I appreciate it,"_ he replied. " _Just let her take this picture of us, and then I'll go tell her to lay off. Okay?"_

" _Fine,"_ Sam rolled her eyes. Wrapping her arm around Freddie's waist she reluctantly posed for the photo. Scarecrows, pumpkins, and bales of hay served as the photo decor, eloquently displaying the fall atmosphere.

Mrs. Benson finally snapped a few shots, and Freddie relieved Sam of her duty. " _Could it have killed you to smile,"_ his mother commented.

Sam angrily gritted her teeth.

" _I'll handle it,"_ Freddie quickly interjected before Sam fought back.

Without saying a word, Sam stormed off in a rage.

Deflated at his girlfriend's demeanor, Freddie approached his mother. " _Mom, this happens every time you're around Sam. Is it really necessary to be so rude to her?"_

" _Is it really necessary to date such a delinquent?"_ his mother shot back.

" _Mom, c'mon,"_ he responded, " _Stop exaggerating."_

" _I'm not exaggerating,"_ she argued. " _Did you hear the lip she gave me when all I wanted was picture?"_

" _That was in retaliation to you addressing her the way you did."_

" _I don't think there was anything wrong with how I spoke to her."_

" _Well, I do,"_ Freddie said bluntly. " _You've been giving her a hard time all day. I think she's done alright today, all things considered."_

" _Fredward Benson!"_ his mother exclaimed, " _I will not tolerate my own son dismissing me like this!"_

" _Mom, I'm not dismissing you. I just…"_

" _That Puckett is rubbing off on you,"_ she cut him off.

" _Look!"_ Freddie shot back sternly, " _Just leave her alone. That's all I'm asking."_ His mother remained quiet. _"I get it. You don't like her. Fine, whatever. She's still my girlfriend, and you should at the very least respect that."_

" _Freddie, I only want…"_

" _What's best for me,"_ he finished her sentence, " _I know. I've heard this song and dance before."_

" _Well, I'd wish you'd listen then,"_ she said. " _I don't know when you got so stubborn."_

" _Maybe I'm not the stubborn one Mom,"_ Freddie walked off.

After escaping from the nuisance that was Mrs. Benson, Sam sat by the fire pit the pumpkin patch had going. She brooded in silence, annoyed at the presence of all the other patch goers occupying her surroundings. Holding her hands to the low flames, she warmed them from the brisk October air. It was only mid-October, but the cold had come quickly this fall season. As she slightly shivered, she suddenly felt a gentle caress on her back, it was Freddie.

" _It's pretty cold huh? Probably should've worn more than sweatshirt today,"_ he joked. " _Here, I got you some hot apple cider,"_ he held out a cup for her.

Deadpan, she glanced at the cup and then looked away before pulling her hands away from the fire and crossing her arms.

" _Don't be mad Sam,"_ he said gently. " _My mom is just ridiculous, you know that."_

Reluctantly, she dropped her tensive demeanor and turned back to him. She let out a sigh and rested her head onto his shoulder. " _Why doesn't she like me?"_ she uttered, in a seemingly genuinely bothered tone.

" _I don't know,"_ he replied, " _Guess she still just sees you as the troublesome teenager from when we were younger."_

" _That's totally unfair,"_ she said, " _I know I can be a little irritable, but I think I've done a good job getting my chiz together as we've grown up."_

" _You have,"_ Freddie assured her. " _Unfortunately, my mom doesn't see that."_

" _I hate it,"_ Sam replied.

" _Don't even worry about it,"_ he told her.

" _No I will,"_ she argued, _"It sucks knowing my boyfriend's mother can't stand me, I hate it._ _I want her to like me. I really do, but she starts being rude and I can only take so much before I start getting angry. I don't know what else to do."_

Freddie patted her on the thigh, " _There's nothing else to do. You're not the problem."_

" _I guess,"_ Sam sighed. " _Sorry I took some of my anger out on you."_

" _No offense taken,"_ he replied, " _I understand."_

She smiled, " _I'll take my apple cider now."_

Freddie chuckled as he passed her the cup.

" _So anyway,"_ Sam pivoted the conversation, " _You basically owe me a favor since I obliged to come on this trip."_

" _Is that so?"_ he replied in joking fashion, to which she raised her eyebrows. " _Lay it on me,"_ he said, " _What do you want?"_

" _Well, its Halloween season and I haven't done anything scary yet,"_ she said deviously.

" _Nope!"_ he instantly replied.

" _What? Aw, c'mon,"_ she said, " _Why not?"_

" _I don't do scary,"_ he replied. " _Last time you convinced to do something scary we got trapped inside a haunted apartment."_

Sam laughed, " _Dude, we were like thirteen, and the place wasn't even haunted. Remember? It was just some old deaf lady who lived there."_

" _It was still scary when it was happening,"_ he argued, " _And that just means something that's actually supposed to be scary will be even worse."_

" _Oh, don't be such a nub,"_ she said. " _Live a little."_

" _I really don't want to."_

" _Please,"_ she batted her eyelashes at him.

" _That's not fair,"_ he replied to her underhanded tactics, but she knew she had him once she gave him the eyes. He was always so easily swooned by his devious blonde partner. " _I'll think about it,"_ he caved, to which she smiled victoriously.

" _I saw a sign earlier for a haunted house, we should do that,"_ she said. " _It looked cool."_

" _Maybe,"_ he said as she chuckled at his tentativeness.

**_Chapter II: "Handing Out L's"_ **

A few days later at Spencer's, the guys were having a little hangout. Typical nerd stuff, videogames and whatnot.

" _Bam! That's game!"_ Freddie gloated as he defeated Gibby in the Galaxy Wars videogame.

" _Alright, alright,"_ Gibby replied. " _Have a little humility, it's just a videogame."_

" _Don't be mad cause' I won,"_ Freddie continued in braggadocios fashion. " _Take the L with some dignity."_

" _I want a rematch,"_ Gibby challenged him.

" _Whoa whoa,"_ Spencer interrupted. _"Take your seat in the loser's bracket, and pass that controller along,"_ he joked, " _It's my turn."_

" _You're lucky,"_ Gibby joked to Freddie as he tossed Spence the controller.

" _You ready to lose to the superior gamer?"_ Spencer taunted Freddie.

" _Bring it,"_ Freddie replied in confidence.

" _Hello nub-heads,"_ Sam came strolling in before they started up the next game.

" _Hey,"_ Both Spencer and Gibby greeted her back.

Taking a seat next to her boyfriend she pecked him on the cheek. " _Hello, nubbiest-head,"_ she joked.

" _Hey babe,"_ he responded.

" _What're guys doing?"_ she asked.

" _I'm handing out L's to these fools on Galaxy Wars,"_ he bragged.

" _This guy,"_ Gibby sarcastically pointed his thumb at him, _"He wins one game and thinks he's hot chiz."_

" _Hey, I earned my bragging rights,"_ Freddie joked. " _Wanna play?"_ he offered Sam.

" _Hard pass,"_ she said bluntly, to which Freddie playfully rolled his eyes. " _But hey, I got a surprise,"_ she continued.

" _What do ya mean?"_ he asked, as a devious grin manifest on her face. " _I don't like that face,"_ he said fearfully.

She chuckled at his tentativeness again. Reaching into her pocket she said " _Check it out!"_ and pulled out two tickets.

" _What're these?"_ He grabbed one and read it aloud, " _Fear-Fest: The Most Haunted Attraction in Seattle. Ghouls, Ghosts, and Goblins."_

" _Oh cool, you guys got tickets to Fear-Fest? I heard it's awesome,"_ Spencer chimed in.

" _I know! The reviews all say it's the best Halloween attraction around,"_ Sam replied in excitement.

" _Sweet! Have fun,"_ he said.

" _Whoa, whoa, whoa. Pump the breaks,"_ Freddie put a hand up. " _The 'most haunted attraction in Seattle'?"_

" _Uh-huh!"_ Sam said excitedly.

" _I never agreed to this!"_ Freddie objected.

" _Yeah-huh!"_ Sam shot back. " _You agreed at the pumpkin patch the other day."_

" _I said maybe,"_ he argued.

" _That basically meant yes,"_ Sam replied.

" _Even if I did mean 'yes',"_ he continued, _"I didn't think you'd buy tickets to the 'most haunted attraction in Seattle'."_

" _Oh, c'mon,"_ she said, " _That's just a tagline they use to make it sound scary. It's not like it's really haunted."_

" _Oh yeah, I'm sure,"_ he replied sarcastically.

" _Ahem,"_ Gibby interrupted. " _I can't help but notice there is only two tickets there."_

" _Very observant of you,"_ Sam replied sarcastically.

" _What?_ _You don't think me, and Spence like haunted houses too?"_ he asked.

" _Oh, don't get so whazzed off about it,"_ Sam waved him off. " _We hangout as a group all the time. I'd like to actually go on proper date with my boyfriend every once in a while."_

" _That's whack,"_ Gibby shook his head.

" _C'mon, Gibby. Let them be a couple for once,"_ Spencer interjected.

" _Whatev,"_ Gibby shrugged it off condescendingly.

" _I still never agreed to this!"_ Freddie blurted out in the midst of everything.

" _Well these tickets were forty dollars each, so you better,"_ Sam told him.

" _Forty dollars?!"_ he replied. " _Sam, we're supposed to be saving for a place."_

" _I know,"_ she replied, " _But we haven't done any fun Halloween things yet. Can't you just let this slide?"_

" _I don't know, Sam that's a lot of money."_

" _We're almost at our goal amount anyway, we can afford a little fun,"_ she said.

" _That's not the point though,"_ he argued.

" _Please,"_ she shot him the eyes just like before.

" _Ya know, one of these days that's gonna stop working on me,"_ he said.

" _But today is not that day,"_ she said flirtatiously.

Shaking his head at her devious tactics he caved again, " _Fine, whatever. Just because I owe you one though."_

" _Yes! Thank you,"_ she replied.

" _Yeah, yeah,"_ he said waving her off.

" _Don't be mad, take the L with some dignity,"_ Gibby quipped as he victoriously walked to the fridge to grab a Wahoo Punch. Spencer and Sam laughed.

 ** _Chapter III:_** " ** _Ghouls, and Ghosts, and Whatnot"_**

The weekend rolled around, and the young couple when out on their spooky date. Just a short drive away from the haunted attraction known as _'Fear Fest'_ , they made a brief stop beforehand to grab bite to eat. " _I'm gonna be all over your food if you don't start eating,"_ Sam joked as Freddie slowly picked at his fries, far too nervous about their imminent haunted escapade to have an appetite.

" _I can't eat,"_ Freddie replied. " _I keep thinking about ghouls, and ghosts, and whatnot."_

" _It's not gonna be that scary,"_ she tried to ease his nerves. " _Trust me, it's gonna be fun."_

" _I trust you,"_ he said. " _Ghouls? Not so much."_

Sam laughed, " _Seriously though, pass those fries this way if you're not eating them."_ He obliged. After finishing up at the restaurant, they headed to the car. " _Are you really that scared?"_ she asked him as they walked through the parking lot.

" _Kinda_ ," he shrugged. " _Scary stuff is not thing."_

" _The only people who say that are the ones who haven't done it,"_ she said. " _It's like going a roller coaster for the first time. Sure, it's scary, but after you do it once, you love them."_

" _I guess we'll see,"_ he raised his eyebrows.

A little bit of guilt started to plague Sam, she didn't want to force him to do something he didn't want to. She also worried this would end up becoming more fodder for his mother to claim she was a bad girlfriend. " _We don't have to go,"_ she said. " _If you're really not feeling it, I'll understand."_

" _No, no,"_ he replied. " _I owe you one, and I'm sticking to it."_

" _Dude, it's okay,"_ she assured him. " _This is already enough, just being on a real date with you for once. We're always so busy anymore that we never have any us time. I'd like to do this more often."_

Freddie smiled. " _Awh, I love when your nubby side comes out,"_ he joked.

" _Stopppp,"_ she groaned playfully, " _I hate when you make me feel awkward for being nubby. You're supposed to be the nubby one in this relationship."_ He laughed. " _But seriously,"_ she continued _, "I'm not gonna force you to go if you're that scared. We can just go see a movie or something if you want."_

He desperately wanted to agree to this alternative, but he too was feeling guilty. He knew Sam was incredibly excited about the haunted house, and did not want to let her down. " _No, don't worry,"_ he said _, "I'll still go."_

" _Are you sure?"_ she asked. " _I really don't want to make you do something you don't want to. Let's not go,"_ she began to insist.

" _Nope,"_ he stood his ground.

" _Don't say I didn't give you the chance to change your mind."_

_"I won't."_

_"Last chance,"_ she reiterated.

Opening the passenger seat's car door, he grabbed a pen and paper from the glove compartment.

" _What the heck are you doing?"_ she asked.

He remained silent, and quickly wrote something on the paper while leaning on the hood of the car before handing it to her.

Looking down at the paper, she saw he had written one letter on it. " _What's this?"_ she shrugged in confused fashion.

" _An 'L',"_ he said, " _I win this argument. Let's go,"_ and opened the car door back up for her.

 _"Okayyy then,"_ she replied with a flirty smile, chuckling at his witty play. Minutes later they were in route.

**_Chapter IV: "It's Not So Bad"_ **

Gravel scrapped the soles of their shoes as the couple walked down the path that led to the spookily decorated entrance of _'Fear Fest'_. Eerie music played over the speakers as screams from other attraction goers that were already on the inside could be heard in the distance.

" _You need me to hold your hand?"_ she poked fun at him.

" _Alright, I'm not that scared,"_ he argued playfully.

" _Okay, okay,"_ she laughed and put her hands up.

As they approached the line, there were actors dressed up as the advertised ghosts, and ghouls all over the place for people to take selfies with. Sam suggested they get picture with one of them, but Freddie declined, cautiously staying away from those ghouls he ' _didn't trust.'_ Finally getting in the line, they read the wait time from their position, ' _30 minutes from this point.'_

" _That's not too bad,"_ Sam commented. " _I thought this place would be mobbed."_

" _Yeah, not bad all,"_ he replied as he anxiously surveyed his surroundings, trying not to seem so afraid. It wasn't working.

She chuckled at his cute attempts to play it cool. " _Take it easy there Fredbag,"_ she said, " _We're not even near the front of the line yet..."_

" _Eaaahhhh!"_ one of the actors playing a ghoul suddenly interrupted and scared her.

" _Ahhhhhhh!"_ she shrieked in fear, louder than Freddie had ever heard her before. She cowered behind him, clutching onto his hoodie and peaking over his shoulder. Surprisingly enough, Freddie didn't even flinch at the actors attempt to give them scare.

" _Sam relax,"_ he said, " _It's just one of the people who work here."_

" _Huh? What?"_ her voice trembled.

" _Look, he's already walking away,"_ Freddie told her. " _He's going around scaring people in line. Guess he got you,"_ he laughed.

" _Just a little bit,"_ she admitted.

" _How bout' that?"_ he said. " _You jumped and I didn't,"_ he laughed. " _Maybe this won't be so bad."_

" _Alright, settle down there nub-head,"_ she replied. " _I get scared once and now you got your big boy pants on."_

" _Wait, he's coming back,"_ Freddie alarmed her.

" _What?!"_ she fearfully ducked behind him again.

" _Just kidding,"_ he chuckled.

" _That's not funny,"_ she playfully punched him in the arm.

" _Sorry, couldn't help myself,"_ he said.

As the line methodically moved along, it was Sam who found herself becoming more and more anxious, continuing to hide behind Freddie anytime one of the scary actors even came close to them. Meanwhile, Freddie was actually getting a kick out of everything, seemingly getting less anxious and more excited for the attraction.

" _They're just people in masks,"_ he commented to her.

" _Yeah, but that one keeps looking at me,"_ she replied. " _It's creepy."_

" _That's because he sees you hiding behind me. He knows you're scared so he keeps messing with you."_

" _How the heck did this happen?"_ she asked. " _An hour ago you didn't even want to be here, and now you're telling me not be scared."_

" _I dunno,"_ he replied. " _Now that I'm here it's not so bad. This is actually kinda fun."_

" _Well you don't have crazy ghoul monsters staring you down everywhere you look,"_ she commented.

" _I told you, they're singling you out because they see your reaction."_

" _Well, I don't like it. I'm scared,"_ she admitted outright. " _Can we leave?"_

" _What? Why?"_ he replied. " _We're like ten minutes from the front of the line."_

" _Well, I changed my mind,"_ she said bluntly.

" _Oh, how the tables have turned,"_ he said deviously.

" _Don't be a whazz-bag,"_ she said, " _C'mon, let's leave."_

" _Oh, c'mon Sam,"_ he pleaded. " _You were so excited for this all week. You can do it."_

" _Yeah, that was before we got here and I got all creeped out by this place."_

" _It won't be that bad,"_ he told her.

" _You don't know that."_

He chuckled at her nervousness. " _C'mon, we paid for the tickets already. We might as well get our money's worth."_

" _Ughhh, fine,"_ she groaned, " _But you owe me one."_

" _Me being here was 'owing you one',"_ he threw his hands up.

" _Not anymore,"_ she joked. " _Now keep standing in front of me so these monster people leave me alone."_

**_Chapter V: "I Just Know"_ **

Despite her ever growing fear, Sam managed brave it through the attraction. Of course, she desperately clung to Freddie for dear life, and hid behind him the entire way through, but she still made it out alive. At one point in the midst of it all, she almost hit one of the actors out of fear, but luckily Freddie stopped her. As they staggered out of the place, she was still clinging to his arm for protection, fearful that one of the actors might try to pull another fast one on her. The couple chuckled together as the made their way back to the car.

" _I can't believe you almost swung at the ghost in there,"_ Freddie laughed.

" _It was dark, and it came out of nowhere,"_ she said. " _It's a good thing you stopped me because that could've gotten really ugly."_

" _Yeah,"_ he chuckled, " _But hey, it wasn't so bad after all huh?"_

" _Maybe for you,"_ she replied.

He laughed. _"Jeez, look how stretched out my hoodie is from you grabbing at it the whole time,"_ he commented.

" _Sorry,"_ she laughed.

" _Who'd have thought you'd be one scared to death,"_ he continued to acknowledge how fearful she was.

" _Alright, alright,"_ she replied, " _Stop teasing me, you're supposed to be the nice one here."_

" _I'm just saying, it's gonna funny to tell everyone how the fearless Sam Puckett hid and cowered behind Freddie Benson the whole time,"_ he boasted.

" _It would be funny I guess…"_ he voice trailed off and she looked away. " _But I know you're not gonna do that."_

" _Oh yeah? How do you know that?"_ he asked.

" _I just know,"_ she turned back with a flirty smile, shooting him the eyes once again.

He raised his eyebrows with a smirk, " _Gets me every time."_

" _I know,"_ she said deviously. " _And I'm gonna tell everyone that it was your nubby butt who was scared, not me."_

" _That's not fair,"_ he argued.

“ _Hey you should know by now that I don’t play to be fair,”_ she said pulling the piece of paper he gave her earlier out from her pocket, _“Mama, plays to win,”_ and she gave him back his _'L'_ he wrote to her.

Shaking his head he said, " _Guess I'll never learn."_

" _Guess not,"_ she grabbed his hand as they neared the car, stopping him from walking any further. She pulled him close and threw her arms around him with a smile. " _But thanks for taking me out tonight. Scary chiz aside, I had fun."_

He nodded as he smiled back at his blonde partner. He gave her a quick peck before pulling out his PearPhone for a time check. " _It's only 10:30,"_ he smirked.

Playfully rolling her eyes she said, " _You're such a nub-head,"_ before leaning back in to kiss him again.


End file.
